DDO: The Wight at the End of the Tunnel

Delera’s Tomb has some sort of unhealthy obsession with dead girls. You have the “Dead Girl’s Notebook” one-off. Then you have the whole Delera questline proper, where you free the spirit of the dead girl and then hunt down the evil necromancer what did it to her.

It’s as if Turbine’s quest scripters had come off a weekend binge that included a half dozen Japanese horror movies, stumbled into work on a Monday with their brain cells still crackling, and wrote what they saw when they closed their eyes.

There’s an undercurrent of despair to most of DDO’s quests. Having children means living your life worrying that something bad will happen to them. In Stormreach, something bad ALWAYS happens to them. But then again, pretty much everyone in the DDO universe is living on borrowed time. No matter who you are or how much good you’ve done, somewhere someone has just given a bunch of wisecracking adventurers the quest to kill you.

Last week, we freed Delera’s shade from its eternal torment, but even released, she could find no peace. There could never be a rest for her while her tormentor still lived his unlife. Sunday, then, we took on the evil power of the graveyard, Dreadlord Giddeon.
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DDO: Getting the Wight Out

Yeah, that was the easiest trap to find EVER! We were running past and someone (I want to say Ulan, but it probably wasn’t) suggested taking a screenshot of us. I’m like, great! Look at all these bridges and ladders! Perfect spot! And then they pointed out the giant goat head behind us.

First on the menu — getting Ulan, our Friend from the North, into the exclusive ranks of the Order of Cannith. You know, I’d like an order of toast, an order of iced tea, and an Order of Cannith. Anyway, not just anyone can be a member of the Order. There’s a long application that will take a few hours to fill out, and hitting the ‘submit’ button at the end gives you a PAGE NOT FOUND error. Then you’ll have to talk to our HR person about doing a personal interview over Skype. Dress nicely!

Actually, I found out I had somehow become an officer. So I invited him in. Everyone was an officer! Spode was an officer! Gleek was an officer! Shy(sp?) was an officer! YOU’RE AN OFFICER! EVERYONE IS AN OFFICER!

And officers can change the guild message of the day.

Bwa. Ha. Ha.

First up: The Living Dead Girl’s Notebook. That timed dungeon had driven Spode and I bonkers last week, but it was no trouble this week. Spode the Unsinkable gallantly offered to watch the locked door open while the rest of us played in the water tunnels, which was kind of him :)

Next: “Free Delera”, the middle quest in the Delera’s Tomb series. You run around the dungeon unlocking five soul locks, all apparently built in order to keep Delera’s shade trapped. Okay, let’s pause here a moment.

Someone spent a LOT of money and a LOT of time building this dungeon and planting Delera within, making all these soul locks and everything. Did they not realize that ghosts and shades can be banished? Wouldn’t that have been a LOT LESS TROUBLE? Like, they could hire a party of adventurers to “Kill Delera’s Ghost so it stays dead this time”, and then it would get done. Wouldn’t that be a lot easier than “Spend ten years and millions of gold pieces to build a huge, sprawling tomb for Delera, install her ghost in it, seal it with five soul locks, then hire a party of adventurers to clear the dungeon, unlock the five soul locks and kill Delera’s Ghost so it stays dead this time?”

In the end, we didn’t kill her, but we did get her to talk to us. Something about a dread lord, undoubtedly fresh out of dread lord school.

Next week, we kill him.

DDO: All the Wight Moves

It was a night of crime and pun-ishment in Dungeons & Dragons Online last night. The crime was courtesy of the bandit crew we ousted from their little underground hole last night. The pun-ishment, alas, we inflicted upon ourselves.

It’s just not Team Spode until Spode logs in, so the Spode-less crew milled about, uncertain and with no purpose in life. Ulan, I think, had found a quick quest we could do for House Jorasco while waiting for the rest of the group. New cleric Shananana(sp?) wasn’t online, so, heck, why not? And then Spode logged in and we were good to go. Now, Spode’s also been grinding a quest he found in a tavern in the Marketplace, and we’d been talking about doing that one on elite. So we did them both!

I stopped by my guild airship on the way. When asked why, I explained that I needed to get buffed up — my guild (TEH “GAMERZ” RULE OMG!) has four NPCs who have just one purpose in their life, and that is to cast buffs on anyone who asks. Why wouldn’t I want to stop by and get them? That sparked some discussion on, like, maybe we could all join the same guild? Sure, guys, but you slackers all went joining different guilds and never invited me to join. So I went and accepted the first random ninja guild invite that came my way. Don’t blame ME if your guild airship is small and puny and smelling of elderberry.

My guild’s airship smells of baby burps and kitty purrs.

Our first mission, Mirra’s Sleepless Nights, was a rogue’s paradise. “Never fear, I HAVE THIS!” I shouted as I tried ineffectively to disable a cold trap and was frozen to death before I could unlock the one shrine door. So I watched spectrally as everyone else killed the iron golems that were keeping poor Mirra awake. I WILL go back and figure that trap out!

Next up was Spode’s quest, from the Phoenix Tavern in the Stormreach Marketplace, the Swiped Signet. He’d mastered the dungeon on hard mode already, opening elite mode for us all.

This place, full of water, narrow catwalks, and narrow catwalks over water, is just the kind of place Spode hates, but he danced over them like Philippe Petit. Normally nimble Gleek, however, kept falling. I sense some enchantment, here… Gleek had to make a couple runs to the rez shrine, but the run went fairly smoothly.

It was just short of midnight when we finally started on Delera’s Tomb — the perfect time to be tromping through a graveyard! A graveyard filled with nasties from DDO’s Halloween event. The event was so buggy on the actual Halloween that they brought it back for a couple of weeks so that people could have their belated fun. Gleek had been there already and was turning everyone into skeletons. Also turning us into skeletons were the actual skeletons and other undead, who would occasionally turn up and smack someone into the ground.

Once into the tomb, we turned up our sound so we could hear Gary Gygax’s narration of the adventure. “The door suddenly crashes to the floor,” he’d intone, “as do the lids of ancient sarcophagi as a legion of undead issues forth.”

Gleek and Spode were killing each other softly with undead-themed puns the rest of the night. “I’m a-ghast!” shouted Spode. After that, there was absolutely no stopping us. We finished the quest without much trouble, which was just the first of four or five, and then spent the rest of the evening hunting down respawning Ghostly Skeletons for the optional quest objective.

I was in freaking HEAVEN! There is nothing, well, ALMOST nothing I like better in this world than trying to incite someone to murder through puns alone.

I’m not going to tell them all to you now. As we go through Delera’s Tomb, the best ones I can remember will be the post titles :)

Next week, more Delera’s Tomb. Will our cleric, Shazzama(sp?), join us? We’ll find out Sunday!