D&D — Where We Are Now

Our new best friend!
Our new best friend!

I want to try an experiment tonight — I want to try and “live blog” tonight’s D&D session here on West Karana. But I haven’t blogged about our ongoing D&D campaign in so long, that the very least I can do is reprint my write-up of last week’s session. My dirty secret is that I blog a LOT, I just do it during breaks at work. And this blog… is blocked at work, so I do my blogging on Google+.

I may backfill previous weeks, but for now, here’s LAST week.


“The Rise of Dimsdale”

Six deadly, bloodthirsty, snakey Yuan-Ti fell before our righteous wrath. Well, one ran off, so five. FIVE deadly, bloodthirsty Yuan-Ti fell and… well, technically that one in the corner there wasn’t ENTIRELY dead. So FOUR deadly, etc.

I still had TONGUES running on myself from the parley with the bearded demon guards which sounds kinda yucky now that I say it out loud. I thought the surviving Yuan-Ti would want to lighten the burden of his poisoned heart by explaining all the plots and machinations that brought he and his group here, but after explaining that we would soon meet our end in the POOOOOOOL (he pronounced this with six syllables for extra emphasis), he seemed more concerned with his impending death.

I shrugged and gave Zalandrin the look that says “you can kill this one now”. To be honest, Zalandrin interprets most looks that way. This time, though, the psycho-ranger (which sounds like an awesome job title now that I say it out loud like that) declined to kill a monster that wasn’t fighting back, and just knocked him out and piled the corpses of the remaining Yuan-Ti on top of him for some reason.

This, by the way, is the same psycho-ranger who killed someone for simply looking in our tent once.

In any event, we were all headed down a slippery slope to our own destruction.

I mean that literally. The way forward was down an actual slippery slope that widened out to a super slippery bridge over a pit so deep that no 10′ pole could touch its bottom. There were three Yuan-Ti stationed on the bridge, looking generally our way but seemingly not terribly concerned about us.

I did a little bardish geometry in my head. If I were at the origin, O, of a circle with a radius r of 15 feet, and the radii of force intersected the positions of YT 1, 2 and 3 in such a way as to continue them off the bridge, then… aw heck. I ran up to the edge of the bridge and shouted THUNDERWAVE!!!!!

A gentle breeze softly caressed the scales of the three Yuan-Ti. They smiled sibilantly and rolled their saving throws and stayed planted on that bridge. One walked up and casually nicked my arm with their blade.

That was my favorite lute arm, too! Well, now I was angry. But not as angry as Zalandrin, who angrily planted arrows into the walls. Not as angry as Ellryn, who angrily ran down onto the bridge and slipped off the edge.

Ellryn managed to grab at the side of the bridge just before he plunged to what might have been his death, and barely dodged the Yuan-Ti trying to help him down the rest of the way.

Well, we gnomes have to look out for each other. I ran down, ducked beneath the attack of a Yuan-Ti and dimension doored the both of us back up the stairs.

Ellryn looked almost disappointed. Shouting “AGAIN!”, he ran down — again — and fell over the side — AGAIN. This time he couldn’t grab the edge. It was a fall of 120 feet, but he sprang lightly to his feet and was ready for more. More POISONOUS SNAKES! This was a SNAKE PIT! BWAHAHAHAHA! — is what the DM was saying!

Ellryn started climbing the walls of the pit as Zalandrin and I worked on the remaining Yuan-Ti. He couldn’t get all the way up, but got close enough that some rope could bring him up the rest of the way.

With him back in the game, we were able to take out the rest of the Yuan-Ti and the more human-like one that showed up to trade arrows with Zalandrin.

We tied ourselves together to make the perilous trip over the bridge to the other side.

Ellryn fell over the side. AGAIN. But he did not manage to pull the rest of us over with him, and we managed to get past the bridge with minimal additional death.

We’d been hearing some yelling for quite some time, and it got louder as we headed deeper. Past a room filled with pits and snake totems, we found a block of cells. One of the cells held an emaciated dwarf that nobody wondered at the time if he might be the dwarf we’re looking for. (We did wonder if this was Gina’s lost boyfriend, though). The other held a halfling wizard, who with great bluster announced himself as Dimsdale Butterworth, the Pulsating Pustule of Scintillation. Or something.

Though a wizard of great power and much renown, Dimsdale the I Can’t Believe It’s Not A Wizard admitted that the book from which he learned his wizardly acumen was missing pages for a couple spells, such as Knock and Mage Hand.

I kept suggesting potential spells that might help him out, but Zalandrin just rolled his eyes and tossed the set of keys that hung on a nail into the cell and told the halfling to get himself out. We had more pressing things to worry about, as several Yuan-Ti were heading to us from the snake totem room.

We ran out and started the fight and were doing pretty well, when Dinsdale Transfat the Ever Quivering came running past us as naked as the day they pulled him out of the pancake syrup. MAGIC OVERPOWERING FOOT ODOR! he yelled, as he kneecapped one of the Yuan-Ti. FIVE FINGER FIST OF FIRE WHICH IS TOTALLY A REAL SPELL! he roared as he slapped another one.

The rest of us just had to pause for a moment to take all this in, but we eventually just shrugged and got back to the snake killing party.

And that was that for the night.

REALLY fun session, met our newest party member, Dimsdale Butterstick the Perpetually Scintillating. And now Ellryn gets his own personality trait. Mine is just being an annoying bard who is more a danger to her own party than any enemy. Zalandrin is a psychokiller with a fear of mushrooms. And now… Ellryn can’t pass a pit without falling in.

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Web developer for a Connecticut-based insurance company that's over 200 years old! Also a bicycler, a blogger, a kayaker, and a hunter of bridges.